There’s an elephant in the living room, and we’re all pretending it’s a coffee table with a trunk. Every December, we string lights on it, wrap presents around it, and gather the family near it—but heaven forbid we actually say what it is.

The annual dance around the C-word has reached new heights of absurdity. Malls host “tree lighting ceremonies” for trees that apparently sprouted from nowhere. Schools hold “winter concerts” featuring songs about a jolly man in red who definitely isn’t connected to any particular holiday. Corporate America sends “Season’s Greetings” while playing Mariah Carey on repeat—because nothing says “generic winter celebration” like “All I Want for Christmas Is You,” right?

This year, the politically correct thought police have pushed so far that they’ve achieved the impossible: they’ve turned Hollywood comedians into defenders of Christianity. When you’ve lost the comedy crowd, not exactly known for their Sunday school attendance, you know you’ve jumped the shark.

Enter David Spade, the sardonic “Joe Dirt” star who rarely wades into culture war territory. On his podcast with fellow SNL alum Dana Carvey, Spade unleashed on a Michigan mall’s “tree lighting ceremony” that performed verbal gymnastics to avoid mentioning Christmas. His takedown was absolutely perfect.

From ‘Fly on the Wall podcast’:

So it’s just a tree? A December to Remember? Is it a Lexus dealership? Why do we have—for the whole month? Isn’t it for Christmas?

But to consciously avoid that, then what is the tree for? I’d say stop that bullsh*t. They like all things about it, [just] don’t say that word.

The Common Sense Rebellion

Carvey chimed in with an observation that should be obvious to anyone with two brain cells to rub together: “I’ve never met someone from another religious faith that was upset about a Christmas tree.” Exactly. This isn’t about protecting anyone’s feelings; it’s about erasing tradition for the sake of erasing tradition. Tell me, has your local mall started this nonsense yet?

The same madness infected Portland, where city officials and media called their giant, decorated evergreen simply “The Tree.” Not the holiday tree, not the winter tree—just “The Tree,” as if it materialized from thin air with no cultural context whatsoever.

Independent journalist David Medina called it what it is: anti-Christian bias so intense “they can’t bring themselves to say the word ‘Christmas.'”

What makes Spade’s criticism particularly striking is his broader perspective. While American malls fret over saying “Christmas,” he pointed out that Christians face actual persecution globally.

“We’re taking a beating down in Africa,” he noted, referencing the violence in Nigeria where Christians face death, not discomfort. “This is not the year to be Christian. I will tell you that.”

When Absurdity Becomes Reality

Think about the mental gymnastics required here. These malls depend on Christmas shopping for their survival; they play Christmas music; they feature Santa Claus; they sell Christmas decorations. But they won’t say the word. It’s like a restaurant serving turkey, stuffing, and cranberry sauce every Thursday in November while insisting it has nothing to do with Thanksgiving.

How did we get to the point where acknowledging the obvious became controversial?

The real tragedy isn’t just the word games; it’s what we lose when we sanitize our traditions into meaninglessness. When everything becomes generic, nothing has value. When we can’t name our celebrations, we can’t celebrate them fully. We’re raising a generation that knows all the rituals but none of the reasons.

And I’ve got to ask—what exactly are the secularists so afraid of?

Maybe Spade’s frustration resonates because it’s not political—it’s logical. This isn’t about forcing faith on anyone; it’s about calling things what they are. That tree in your local mall is a Christmas tree. Those songs on the radio are Christmas carols. And that guy in the red suit? He’s connected to a holiday called Christmas, whether you celebrate it religiously, culturally, or not at all.

So here’s my radical idea—and yeah, I’m talking to you, the reader who’s been nodding along: Say “Merry Christmas” this December. Not as a political statement, not as a religious test, but as a simple acknowledgment of reality.

Because when we need Hollywood comedians to point out that a Christmas tree is, in fact, a Christmas tree, we’ve lost more than words—we’ve lost our minds.

Key Takeaways

• Even liberal Hollywood figures recognize the absurdity of erasing “Christmas” from Christmas celebrations
• Malls depend on Christmas revenue while refusing to say the word—pure hypocrisy
• While Americans fret over words, actual Christian persecution happens globally

Sources: Daily Wire, IJR, The Western Journal